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About Varied / Student Member Ford1114Male/United States Groups :iconcrossgenerations: CrossGenerations
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Deviant for 7 Years
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I can usually pray of finals/projects week should end..
So it's that regretful that I'm not afraid to do the right thing. Sometimes when the new year comes, its change.
So it's now downloadable on IOS.
One good news is that I pass one of my university's special requirements that is something to do with the Writing Proficiency Evaluation. Yeah one of the few universities in the states that has that, but I made it with flying colors. Now I can envision my undergraduate graduation on track in 2016. Which I originally could have done it next year, but due to being a transfer student..

Some people notice that I deleted my summer reflection journal. Okay, the truth is that despite I want to move on, I still reflect the consequences of my actions months ago. Again, I'm keeping any personal stuff private, but its something to understand at this point.


Yes, I was involve in a private conflict. It feels that its the 5th anniversary that back in 2009, this was one of the worst years for a group of certain users, where friendships and drama devastated our well-being. It feels that reference that despite being now grown ups instead of whiny emo teenagers, reality still ensures. 

Nowadays, there's a fic recently (I don't want to mention it, someone mention it now brings back bad memories and how when it was seemly revived 2 years ago cause my 'controlling' and egotistic attitude to resurface. Please, I don't want anything mention this title as its the cause of friendship breakup to most people back then)...

The fact that this user (not mentioning the name and gender) could have been a full time artist and future instead of doing these stories as wasting peoples time (some people believe that user is doing this to get people's attention back in the teenage days). I'm the 'man of reason' to second guess that user's motives, but I became forgetful and went too far.

On the other side, it turns out I have taken full responsibilities to my faults in hindsight. I was the one responsible back in 2 years ago that when the user announces the fanfic, I sorta make a journal of these 'dream teams' that flourishes it.. Knowing I made that mistake, I could have stay quiet and leave everything in peace.


Another reason (actually, this is the REAL cause of this drift) is how is it the fact that I desire to be assertive and social while this user remains the opposite? (In truth as a reminder, I use to be shy as well..) I have to be this way because of handling the real world sooner or later (regardless that in the workforce, there will be some disrespectful people to deal with. And even outside of the 'online world', I'm still as human that at least I'm modest and don't feel arrogant in specific places such as Disney World and Convention Centers.). 

..Whether its more incline to be good, but what about forgetting that if someone is social that lead to selfishness of having an argument? (I figure out that we have LinkedIn accounts now, which ironically, I am responsible for inviting that user 2 years ago. Not to mention before that user came back to deviantart 2 years ago, the person talk to is ironically me.) 

This is the instance of a quarter life crisis. 

I mean, after everything we've been through, isn't the fact that nothing still changes for that person of being 'less shy' in some fabrication of putting face online instead of real-life? We did meet new people online during our current times in college. But if lately deconstruct I still feel arrogant because of wanting to stand out, lead to hurting some people I'm close too in not respecting their space (to I nearly forget that person did work hard as a game designer. It's like every artwork is an emotional soul and I (in)advertently ruin it under some misunderstanding)

Have I recall that we have some good moments even before these tensions occur? One of those few that is close to this person. I just feel that at first since that conflict, I wanted to simply forget about it. Cue to months later at this point, I realize that recent mistake to the point I honestly miss that person (alongside a few others that user is close too)..

To put it in short words, "What have I done?"


November 14th, I'm turning 22. I have like no plans on getting anything, course I will be that person to make amends to start anew. I know two months are at stake to end this transition year on a good note. 

There's still a lot of things to discuss about in pop culture and I honestly can't be left out. That's the reason people love to do after all.
  • Mood: Guilty
  • Listening to: Random Music
  • Reading: School work, Naruto's ending
  • Watching: Korra, Sword Art Online II
  • Playing: Computer



Artist | Student | Varied
United States


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Add a Comment:
Torheit-die-Katze Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2014  Student Filmographer
Thanks a lot for the fav :la:
bigtimbears Featured By Owner Nov 14, 2014
Wish you a happy Birthday:)
JeffreyFai Featured By Owner Nov 14, 2014
HAPPY BIRTHDAY FORD!!!!!!!!!! If you are at the drinking age than go for it but make sure to eat something first and drink plenty of water!!!!! XD
Sovereign64 Featured By Owner Nov 14, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Happy birthday! :party: :cake:
ObubblesMansion Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the watch friendo.
Damastah101 Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2014
Thanks for the Watch! You're the same Ford1114 from FFnet right? :D
BeekerMaroo777 Featured By Owner Jul 3, 2014  Student General Artist
I see you like Total Drama, so please view this:…
Sovereign64 Featured By Owner May 28, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Hi, can I add some pictures to Fanfic-Meisters?
Ford1114 Featured By Owner May 29, 2014  Student General Artist
sure thing, send me a note of stuff you like to add.
Sovereign64 Featured By Owner May 29, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
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